Five Things
by CafeAime
Summary: Chapter Two: Five things Tosh heard when she wore the pendant; one thing she didn't. Set during Greeks Bearing Gifts.
1. Chapter 1

**To: **gwencooper

**From: **teaboy

**Subject: **None

I hate you.

I hate the way you seem to think that you deserve him. Because you _don't. _You – the bored little girl from the police station who just wants to play with him, like a stupid fucking _puppy _who's never really understood the meaning of a swift kick to the ribs? You know _nothing_. Nothing of him. Nothing of love. You _are_ nothing. _Nothing._

I hate you because you can just waltz in here – how long have you been here? Two months? – and claim that you and you alone hold the key to Jack's heart. If you weren't so blunt with your naivety – if you learnt, perhaps, the definition of the word _consequences - _I would pity you. You, who claim to love Rhys, when you spend most of your time in Owen's bed – you, who claim to have feelings for Owen when you spend the rest of your time pining after Jack – you, who claim to love Jack but you won't turn your back on Rhys, the doting little puppy dog.

I hate you because he loves you. He will always love you. But not in the way he loves me.

**To: **gwencooper

**From: **teaboy

**Subject: **None

I pity you.

I pity you because you seem to think you're special. Something unique. _Sure. _After everything we've seen out there, do you honestly believe you've got what it takes to make Jack settle down? To make Owen fall in love with you? To still have the power left over to make sure that Rhys forgets that you never call – that you abandon him each day like a child to play with her shiny new toy? To have Tosh – gentle, undeserving Tosh – overlook your sabotage of her fragile love? And I… you believe that I will forgive you for your sins?

I pity the way you stumble after him like a small child who's been abandoned by her only friend, and can't bring herself to go and play another game. He always comes back, and you say it's because you're special. It's not. It's because you're so caught up on him, he pities you, just like the rest of us. All of us.

I pity you because you think that he's yours. He will _never _be yours. Never.

**To: **gwencooper

**From: **teaboy

**Subject: **None

I fear you.

I fear you because you hold so much command over him. You walk all over him – dance, jump, stomp on his abused soul – and he'll keep coming back for more. The way that he looks at you sometimes, it's as though he's never seen anything quite like you… and that he likes what he sees.

I fear your confidence. The confidence to reach out and hold his hand, to dance with his heart in ways that I never could. The way he looks at me sometimes… _why can't you be more like Gwen_? The standards are set so high, because of you. The bar has climbed so high into the sky, I can't even see it. You're the high jumper.

I fear you because you are powerful. You have power even over Jack, and you have no idea how frightening that is. That is why I fear you.

**To: **gwencooper

**From: **teaboy

**Subject: **None

I submit to you.

I submit because I know that I will never be as much to him as you are.

I submit because I know that you will always win.

I submit because you have him, and always will.

**To: **gwencooper

**From: **teaboy

**Subject: **None

I fight you.

I will fight you for him – no matter how long it takes, or how much I lose along the way. It doesn't matter, as long as he is mine. _I love him_, Gwen Cooper. Love. Do you even know the _meaning _of the word? I bet you'd say you do. But you're _wrong_. You've always been wrong. Love has no boundaries, no explanation – not one that you could understand, anyway. Love isn't something you _know_ – not intellectually, at least. Love is more powerful than you will ever be, and I love him more than you could ever love. I can give him more. Faith, for one. Trust, for another. I won't walk on him or dance or scream and stomp when I don't get my way – I'll always be there, fighting my corner, because I know that one day soon, he will see through you and you will fall through all the layers of hate and deceit that you have constructed out of paper lies. I just hope I'm there to see it.

There is so much to say… and then so much _more_. But I won't say it. Because you could never, ever understand.

**To: **gwencooper

**From: **teaboy

**Subject: **None

Coffee's ready.

Ianto x


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Bow down to gernumblies, oh Beta Queen :)**

It was Tosh who, that morning, blinked blearily as a steaming cup of coffee was deposited carefully on her desk. Mechanically murmured thanks allowed her to not look away from her computer, but didn't protect her from Ianto's next thoughts.

_No one cares._

"Ianto?" She turned. He didn't.

And then it was Tosh who watched Ianto, in a rare fit of impulsive rage, kicked viciously at a stack of paper work because it was in his way then scrambled, horrified, to pick it up. "Woah, teaboy," Owen sniggered and turned to share an infuriatingly suggestive glance with Gwen who was trying uselessly to stifle her too loud giggles. "Don't keep these things bottled up. It isn't healthy, you know." Ianto smiled his apology almost sincerely before turning his back on the raucous laughter and heading back towards the archives.

_No one listens._

"Ianto?" She turned. He didn't.

And it was Tosh, again, who heard Ianto's muffled curses as his shaking hands got the better of him and scalding hot coffee tipped, soaking through to his skin and staining his favourite suit. Glancing around, it transpired that no one else had heard. If they had, they hadn't said anything.

_No one sees._

"Ianto?" She turned. He didn't.

Then it was Tosh who laughed as Jack impersonated (very badly) a robot as he chased a squealing Gwen around the Hub. The laughter and the squeals helped her to feel a little bit better for a while but didn't drown out Ianto's thoughts as he watched Jack act out something that Tosh was too late to realise was a little too close to home.

_No one knows._

"Ianto?" She turned. He didn't.

(Needing of an example for the next thought… help? Please :P)

She didn't call out. She didn't turn. She reached up and tore the pendant away from her neck.

It was Tosh who heard these things.

But it was Jack who took Ianto's hand and sat him down and made him coffee and listened to his worries and his prayers and saw his tears and told him that everything was going to be ok.

_Jack cares. Jack listens. Jack sees. Jack knows._

_Jack _


End file.
